Quotes and sayings- Whenever you do feel sad or alone or you are getting bored, just read these famous funny sayings. I am sure after reading these famous funny quotes and sayings there will be smile on your face and you will forgot all your sadness. Reading these funny Quotes will make you feel happy and change your mood. We have collected these great funny sayings from various resources and we hope you do like them.
A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted. Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.
Youth is a malady of which one becomes cured a little every day. He’s turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he’s miserable and depressed.
Always laugh when you can. It is cheapest medicine.
Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life.
An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, 'So far so good!'
You can't have everything....where would you put it?
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
Mark Twain
If you wish to live wisely, ignore sayings including this one.
Nothing can confound a wise man more than laughter from a dunce.
Lord Byron
Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
It a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it.
W. Sommerset Morgan
You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark?
A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
College is a refuge from hasty judgment.
style="font-weight: bold;">Robert Frost
It's funny how most activists are pacifists.
Craig Bruce
When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.
Steven Wright
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
Homer Simpson
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Groucho Marx
If you can’t live without me, Why aren’t you dead yet?
Love your enemies. It'll make 'em crazy.
Silence is golden but duck tape is silver.
Anonymous
I told the Inland Revenue I didn’t owe them a penny because I lived near the seaside.
Ken Dodd
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
J.B. Morton
Romance often begins by a splashing waterfall and ends over a leaky sink. Anonymous
I’d like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
Shall I not have intelligence with the earth? Am I not partly leaves and vegetable mould myself.
Henry David Thoreau
You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain't never seen a donkey fly! Ha, ha!
Eddie Murphy, Shrek
I found a great way to attract money... work!
Curtis D. Tucker
Death is a once in a lifetime experience.
Man has his will, but woman has her way.
Holmes
If life is a bowl of cherries, why am I stuck with the pits?
Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
I am in my own little world but it's okay they know me here.
Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad cheque.
* "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." - Casablanca 1942
* "My Mama always said, 'Life was like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're gonna get.'" - Forrest Gump 1994
* "A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on." - Sir Winston Churchill
* "Always treat a famous person as if they're not. And a person who's not as if they were." - Adam Lawrence ~ Perfect 1985
* "Hold on boss, I'm gonna make you famous!" - Freddy B ~ John Q 2002
* "Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm." - Ralph Waldo Emmerson
* "A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. " – Herm Albright
Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true.
Nothing is predestined: The obstacles of your past can become the gateways that lead to new beginnings.
Everyday is a gift, thats why they call it the present.
Inspiration and genius–one and the same.
The future depends on what we do in the present.
There is a light at the end of every tunnel….just pray it’s not a train!.
Find something you love to do and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.
Misery is almost always the result of thinking.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness.
There are three words I like to repeat to myself: glass half full. Just to remind myself to be grateful for everything I have.
I have enjoyed life a lot more by saying yes than by saying no.
Don’t waste a minute not being happy. If one window closes, run to the next window — or break down a door.
Happiness is the best face lift.
Think of the beauty still left around you and be happy.
If you spend your whole life waiting for the storm, you’ll never enjoy the sunshine.
I never need to see the sun again, there enough light in your eyes to light up all the world.
People can live one hundred years without really living a minute.
No Matter what you do there will be critics.
There is dignity in suffering; nobility in pain; but failure is a salted wound, that burns and burns again !
A society grows great when old men plant trees whose shade they know they shall never sit in.
Many say I am just one to try. I say I am one less to quit. – Diego Marchi
(Quote And Sayings)
Quotes and sayings- Whenever you do feel sad or alone or you are getting bored, just read these famous funny sayings. I am sure after reading these famous funny quotes and sayings there will be smile on your face and you will forgot all your sadness. Reading these funny Quotes will make you feel happy and change your mood. We have collected these great funny sayings from various resources and we hope you do like them.
A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted. Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.
Youth is a malady of which one becomes cured a little every day. He’s turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he’s miserable and depressed.
Always laugh when you can. It is cheapest medicine.
Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life.
An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, 'So far so good!'
You can't have everything....where would you put it?
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
Mark Twain
If you wish to live wisely, ignore sayings including this one.
Nothing can confound a wise man more than laughter from a dunce.
Lord Byron
Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
It a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it.
W. Sommerset Morgan
You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark?
A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
College is a refuge from hasty judgment.
style="font-weight: bold;">Robert Frost
It's funny how most activists are pacifists.
Craig Bruce
When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.
Steven Wright
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
Homer Simpson
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Groucho Marx
If you can’t live without me, Why aren’t you dead yet?
Love your enemies. It'll make 'em crazy.
Silence is golden but duck tape is silver.
Anonymous
I told the Inland Revenue I didn’t owe them a penny because I lived near the seaside.
Ken Dodd
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
J.B. Morton
Romance often begins by a splashing waterfall and ends over a leaky sink. Anonymous
I’d like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
Shall I not have intelligence with the earth? Am I not partly leaves and vegetable mould myself.
Henry David Thoreau
You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain't never seen a donkey fly! Ha, ha!
Eddie Murphy, Shrek
I found a great way to attract money... work!
Curtis D. Tucker
Death is a once in a lifetime experience.
Man has his will, but woman has her way.
Holmes
If life is a bowl of cherries, why am I stuck with the pits?
Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
I am in my own little world but it's okay they know me here.
Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad cheque.
* "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." - Casablanca 1942
* "My Mama always said, 'Life was like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're gonna get.'" - Forrest Gump 1994
* "A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on." - Sir Winston Churchill
* "Always treat a famous person as if they're not. And a person who's not as if they were." - Adam Lawrence ~ Perfect 1985
* "Hold on boss, I'm gonna make you famous!" - Freddy B ~ John Q 2002
* "Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm." - Ralph Waldo Emmerson
* "A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. " – Herm Albright
Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true.
Nothing is predestined: The obstacles of your past can become the gateways that lead to new beginnings.
Everyday is a gift, thats why they call it the present.
Inspiration and genius–one and the same.
The future depends on what we do in the present.
There is a light at the end of every tunnel….just pray it’s not a train!.
Find something you love to do and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.
Misery is almost always the result of thinking.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness.
There are three words I like to repeat to myself: glass half full. Just to remind myself to be grateful for everything I have.
I have enjoyed life a lot more by saying yes than by saying no.
Don’t waste a minute not being happy. If one window closes, run to the next window — or break down a door.
Happiness is the best face lift.
Think of the beauty still left around you and be happy.
If you spend your whole life waiting for the storm, you’ll never enjoy the sunshine.
I never need to see the sun again, there enough light in your eyes to light up all the world.
People can live one hundred years without really living a minute.
No Matter what you do there will be critics.
There is dignity in suffering; nobility in pain; but failure is a salted wound, that burns and burns again !
A society grows great when old men plant trees whose shade they know they shall never sit in.
Many say I am just one to try. I say I am one less to quit. – Diego Marchi
A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted. Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.
Youth is a malady of which one becomes cured a little every day. He’s turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he’s miserable and depressed.
Always laugh when you can. It is cheapest medicine.
Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life.
An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, 'So far so good!'
You can't have everything....where would you put it?
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
Mark Twain
If you wish to live wisely, ignore sayings including this one.
Nothing can confound a wise man more than laughter from a dunce.
Lord Byron
Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
It a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it.
W. Sommerset Morgan
You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark?
A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
College is a refuge from hasty judgment.
style="font-weight: bold;">Robert Frost
It's funny how most activists are pacifists.
Craig Bruce
When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.
Steven Wright
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
Homer Simpson
A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke.
Groucho Marx
If you can’t live without me, Why aren’t you dead yet?
Love your enemies. It'll make 'em crazy.
Silence is golden but duck tape is silver.
Anonymous
I told the Inland Revenue I didn’t owe them a penny because I lived near the seaside.
Ken Dodd
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
J.B. Morton
Romance often begins by a splashing waterfall and ends over a leaky sink. Anonymous
I’d like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
Shall I not have intelligence with the earth? Am I not partly leaves and vegetable mould myself.
Henry David Thoreau
You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain't never seen a donkey fly! Ha, ha!
Eddie Murphy, Shrek
I found a great way to attract money... work!
Curtis D. Tucker
Death is a once in a lifetime experience.
Man has his will, but woman has her way.
Holmes
If life is a bowl of cherries, why am I stuck with the pits?
Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
I am in my own little world but it's okay they know me here.
Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad cheque.
* "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine." - Casablanca 1942
* "My Mama always said, 'Life was like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're gonna get.'" - Forrest Gump 1994
* "A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on." - Sir Winston Churchill
* "Always treat a famous person as if they're not. And a person who's not as if they were." - Adam Lawrence ~ Perfect 1985
* "Hold on boss, I'm gonna make you famous!" - Freddy B ~ John Q 2002
* "Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm." - Ralph Waldo Emmerson
* "A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort. " – Herm Albright
Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true.
Nothing is predestined: The obstacles of your past can become the gateways that lead to new beginnings.
Everyday is a gift, thats why they call it the present.
Inspiration and genius–one and the same.
The future depends on what we do in the present.
There is a light at the end of every tunnel….just pray it’s not a train!.
Find something you love to do and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.
Misery is almost always the result of thinking.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
It is better to light a candle than curse the darkness.
There are three words I like to repeat to myself: glass half full. Just to remind myself to be grateful for everything I have.
I have enjoyed life a lot more by saying yes than by saying no.
Don’t waste a minute not being happy. If one window closes, run to the next window — or break down a door.
Happiness is the best face lift.
Think of the beauty still left around you and be happy.
If you spend your whole life waiting for the storm, you’ll never enjoy the sunshine.
I never need to see the sun again, there enough light in your eyes to light up all the world.
People can live one hundred years without really living a minute.
No Matter what you do there will be critics.
There is dignity in suffering; nobility in pain; but failure is a salted wound, that burns and burns again !
A society grows great when old men plant trees whose shade they know they shall never sit in.
Many say I am just one to try. I say I am one less to quit. – Diego Marchi
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment